one thing remains, however: couples must know what works for them and be intentional about weeding out the bad habits that can sink their relationship. you have to strive for contentedness, which is a continuous state of mind, and one that feels doable. but it’s necessary to maintain the assumption that your partner — however flawed and irritating they seem at times — had the best results in mind, despite the result. in this way you will both have pride for yourselves and each other in the ways you got to the other side.” she adds, “keep in mind, too, that your partner will likely change over time, so a shared sense of curiosity — being open to the ways in which he or she changes — can allow you to identify the ways you’ve changed as well.” spoiler alert: everyone screws up, says dumb things, gets stuff wrong. in the worst-case scenarios, the invalidation can devolve into situations that can be humiliating and degrading (“don’t listen to him, he doesn’t know what he’s talking about”).
it’s a learned behavior — and one that can be very difficult to fight. when you’re busy, this means putting it on a schedule and sticking to it. but you can have a night on the couch or a neighborhood walk that is planned and intentionally date-ish. one of the defining aspects of a strong, happy marriage, however, is the ability to get past a fight. by investing in yourself and your own well-being, it shows your partner that you want to be at your best for them.
here’s what they said, and why it’s helped them stay together for the long run. but i realized i loved him, and it was a waste of time to dwell on them. and when it’s just the two of us, we’re usually cracking up. the key is to know yourself and what you want before you pledge yourself to a partnership. since the term ‘i love you’ is so confusing and vague it makes sense to define what that means to both of you, even if you’re total opposites.” – monte, 64, florida (married 40 years) “and that’s okay. other times, one of us wants to get a coffee and run errands on a saturday.
you can take the tests and stuff to figure out what each other’s love language is. a marriage is the same idea, and it’s for the rest of your lives. and because of that, we find our way back to each other every time.” – leanne, 49, nevada (married 25 years) “one of the things my wife and i love about each other is our respective passions. it’s making sure to give each other a kiss before you leave in the morning and as soon as you get home at night. but the mind can play tricks on you and make you start to wonder. you can apologize just for the sake of wanting to end a disagreement and move on. if you can accept that you’ll have stressors in your life, you can train yourself to decide which ones you’ll let affect you and your marriage.
23 damn good pieces of marriage advice ; assume the best of one another stop stonewalling ; communicate respectfully always be flexible. 1. accept and allow 2. imagine life without your partner ; 4. don’t be so damn stubborn 5. choose your own adventure ; 6. do the work 7. you 1. choose to love each other even in those moments when you struggle to like each other. 2. always answer the phone when your husband/wife is, marriage advice for newlyweds speech, marriage advice for newlyweds speech, marriage advice for bridal shower, old fashioned marriage advice, funny, marriage advice from old couples.
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